Monday, April 07, 2008

Because Cori asked for it


Here's the most recent full body photo of me. This was taken right before I left for my birthday party last weekend. I still have a long way to go with the weight loss, but I'm pretty friggin' happy with the results so far. I must admit that I love being able to go into a regular store & have clothes there that actually fit me. I don't think I've ever been able to do that before.

(And in you're interested, you can see more self-portraits from my "365 days" project here on flickr.)

Slacker

I'm a blogging slacker. I keep thinking about blogging, but then life gets in the way & I just never seem to have time. So today I'm making time. Now, let's see... what's been going on?

First off, I had a birthday last week. On Tuesday, April 1 I turned 37 years old. I keep seeing that number & I can't believe it's true. I certainly don't feel 37, which I guess is what matters, right? As of this birthday, I have also lost 60 pounds. I wish I could've lost more, but I'm still happy with this. I've hit a little plateau again, but hopefully I can get back on track again & start to lose even more. My brother is getting married in 5 months & I'll be seeing family for the first time in over a year & I want to be able to wow them. I need to make sure I don't slack off on my training after the marathon. Working out is key.

Speaking of my marathon training, I've still been plagued by little injuries here & there & it's driving me crazy. I haven't had a good feeling about this season & this upcoming marathon for a while now. I just can't shake it. I hope I'm wrong, but as of today, I'm pretty convinced I'm right. It just seems that the second something good happens, something bad happens to "balance it out".

This past Saturday was our big 21 mile practice. My back had been a little sore for a few days before, but I was hoping it wouldn't be a problem during the run. For the most part, it wasn't. I was a little stiff in the beginning, but once I got going, I felt great. I was making good time & wasn't having any problems for the first 13 miles, then I hit the wall. For the next 4 miles, I slowed down significantly. My toes kept cramping up, my left hip & leg were bothering me, & I was exhausted. I went from doing 13 minute miles to about 16 minute miles & all the other runners had passed me. I was the last person left on the course. I felt defeated & just wanted to quit & go home. Just after mile 17 my coach found me & ran with me for a while. She talked to me & got me going a little faster, then left to get back to the finish line. Mile 18 was the Memorial Park water stop & Carmen did a great job of making me laugh by doing a silly little dance, then she told me all I had left was "a loop in the park" (ie: only 3 miles left). Hearing that made me think that maybe I could actually do this. I grabbed some food & gatorade, handed my fuel belt over to Adrienne (the weather was absolutely perfect & I knew I wouldn't need the belt), & decided that I was going to finish strong. I took a deep breath & made myself run stronger. After about a 1/2 mile, I got my second wind. I was running as if it were the first 2 miles instead of the last. When I got to the finish line & saw all the TNT staff & my 2 girlfriends there cheering me on, I kicked it up another notch & bolted past that finish line. I was exhausted & out of breath, but I felt great at the same time. I'd just finished 21 miles in under 5 hours. 6 month ago, that same distance took me more than 6 hours.

The rest of the day, I was tired, but my body felt pretty good. Then Sunday happened. I woke up with screaming quads & a very sore middle back. I took it easy the whole day, but the pain in my back just got worse & worse. Today it was so bad I had to call in sick. It's a different back pain than I've had before. Mostly because it's in my middle back (it's always been my lower back before) but I also I have no problem bending over. It's straightening up all the way & taking any deep breaths that cause me great pain. I'm not sure if it's the actual spine/discs I'm having a problem with, or if it's just the muscles. I'm hoping it's just the muscles. After all, I was pumping my arms pretty hard for almost 5 hours. Hopefully I'll be fine in a day or 2. *crosses fingers* The marathon is in 26 days & I really don't want to have to switch to the half.

Next weekend is the big 2 day walk for breast cancer. Some TNT teammates & friends are walking in honor of our TNT coach, Emily. Emily was supposed to walk with them, but she just can't do it now. She just got out of the hospital yesterday after having a procedure to clear a clogged stent & she's recovering nicely but she's still in a lot of pain. She'll be at the different cheer stations this weekend & I'm sure she'll at least walk part of the way, but there's no way she can go the full 2 days & 39.3 miles. She's a strong lady, but lately I can see her strength is waning. I'm still in denial over everything with her & anything that forces me to see the truth is not welcome. Deep down I know the inevitable will happen, but for now, I can't think about it. I just can't bare it.

I really hate cancer.